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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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So, I keep walking, trying to shake it off. I hit up the park by the lake—Lentvaris Lake, duh. It’s beautiful, man. The water’s glistening, and I’m thinking, “This is the vibe.” But then I see this group of teens blasting music. Like, come on! Can’t a guy enjoy some peace? I’m about to say something, but then they start dancing. And honestly? They’re kinda good. I’m just standing there, watching, and I can’t help but smile.

The buildings of the Lentvaris manor are sold in tenders